Seventh Birthday
Earlier today I saw flowers blooming on a mimosa tree, the same one that I vaguely noticed while walking around our neighborhood in labor, seven years ago. It is so hard to believe that Isabella would be seven. We now have two more kids, ages five and three, and I cannot imagine what our lives would look like with three children at home. Come August, we would have a 2 nd grader, kindergartener, and preschooler. I am not the same person I was while laboring with Isabella. Children change us, both those that we get to raise and those we do not. Isabella made me a mother. Losing her then losing my mom gave me a comfort or familiarity with death that only comes through experience. When co-workers or friends have lost a parent, spouse, or child, I ask them about the person they lost (while being mindful of when I bring it up). I’ve known several people who have had a close family member die by suicide and the topic is no longer taboo for me. I am still anxious about the pregnancies of fami